


i need something to believe in

by exceed



Series: so many things i'd say if only i were able [1]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: (some characters not tagged because of plot reasons), Also...not major angst, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-typical cursing & death, Gen, Talk of blood/death, angus the deals warlock, only tagging major characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 02:11:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14202798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exceed/pseuds/exceed
Summary: “Have a nice day, sirs, and thank you for shopping at McDonald’s Mundane & Magical Mysteries!”One boy works in the moon's shop, supplying nearly anything to those who want something. His smile is wide, the shop is endless, and the deals are fair- as long as you pay the correct price.Taako finds it suspicious.





	i need something to believe in

**Author's Note:**

> A roleswap featuring Angus and Garfield, heavily focusing on Angus. Garfield should not be allowed to be the world's greatest detective.  
> Some characters were not tagged. Please tell me if I need to add any tags! It would be very helpful.
> 
> (this story was thought of and completed in three days. i do not know how i did it. i was in a writing trance. please help.)
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Their first experience with the boy is just after they’re inoculated and everything’s taken care of.

Magnus squints as they enter into a small building located a ways away from the Director’s dome, one that they had been pointed to after only a moment of confusion.

_“Uh, is there anywhere to buy anything up here?”_

_“Oh! Just head that way, past the dining hall. It’ll have a bunch of succulents and it’ll look like one of those charming little stores you see on the surface, yeah?”_

_“Uh...yeah. Sure. Thanks? I guess?”_

Magnus hums, looking over his two companions as they open the door and walk in with a small chime. The inside is deceptively large, almost definitely with magic expanding its interior, and he can see Taako humming with something approaching appreciation as they get past the entrance.

To the left, he can see shelves cluttered with items, chalkboards showing numbers of aisles and what they hold- candies next to cursed daggers, fruits next to enchanted mirrors-

-and to the right there’s an empty counter, a few items behind glass cases that look expensive, and a few succulents and assorted flower pots on the counter.

Charming, really. It gives him a sense of coming home, despite his concept of home not including any of what’s going on in here.

“Pushing the laws of magic, whoever made this,” Taako whistles, ears up in clear interest as they start to make their way into the aisles. There’s almost more attention in the little details than the items- but the items do have neat little tags with their prices and what they’re about, even if they’re mundane, which is more than any Fantasy Costco on the surface would do.

Magnus is impressed, but then again, he was impressed by a lot. Now, Taako’s reaction? That put more weight on everything.

Merle looked unimpressed, but he always looked that way at things like this. He did seem suitably interested by the plants giving green to the warm space though, which was pretty nice. He was with Pan, after all.

“An Extreme Teen Bible…” Merle stopped to squint at a tag as Magnus moved on, making sure to not bump into anything in the slim aisles with his wide frame.

As he made his way into the ‘Combat and Stealth’ aisle, he spotted a slim frame that was shorter than Taako moving out of the aisle. He didn’t get a good look, but, well. It had been the only person in the store besides his companions that he had seen.

Huh.

His eye was caught on an item near the beginning of the aisle- the Phantom Fist. He squinted at the description, shrugged, and backed up to the beginning of the aisle again to pick up one of the small baskets conveniently there. If he didn’t know better, he would have thought that it was magic!

“Phantom Fist, Phantom Fist...ah, there you are,” he said with a laugh, putting it in the basket as he examined the other wares in the large area. Nothing caught his eye until he saw some Stones of Farspeech in the ‘Communications’ aisle, perking up and swiping a few as he looked around for his comrades.

Where were they?

“Hey, uh, Merle? Taako?”

“Yeah?” He could hear Taako’s yelling from what seemed like a far distance away, poking his head out of the aisle to see Taako’s annoyed look twelve aisles down. “What the fuck do ‘ya want?”

“Should I, uh, get three Stones of Farspeech?” He held up his basket as Taako squinted and Merle exited from an aisle three ahead of him, moving to take a better look at what Magnus had. “We could talk on them and stuff whenever we’re separated-”

“Get ‘em,” Taako yelled before vanishing back into the far side of the store while Merle walked into the aisle that Magnus had just exited from, inspecting what looked to be a metal bug after a bit.

He blinked before deciding that, hey, he’d go ahead and search around some more.

Exiting from the jungle of aisles back into the entrance, he looked at an area of the store that hadn’t been immediately noticeable- it had no sign, but there was a spiraling staircase that led into a walkway that overlooked the aisle with more space behind it. There looked to be bookshelves instead of places to sell items, and Magnus peered up at them before heading to the staircase and-

“Um, sir?”

He was stopped by a boy who seemed to be around ten, eleven, watching him from behind clear round glasses and intelligent eyes. Magnus took a step back, gulping- he had no idea who this was, but there was some aura around him that made Magnus fearful of going up to do anything on the upper floor. “I- yes?”

“Were you planning to go up there?” He tilted his head, making Magnus laugh faintly, a hint of dread behind his amusement.

“Uh, no! Not at all. I was just curious as to what was up there?”

“A collection of books that isn’t for sale,” the kid chirped, moving out of his way and towards the succulents on the counter, squinting at them almost like he was checking on their health as they talked. _Weird kid._ “Among other things, but, well. You’re not allowed up there!”

“And you are?”

“Of course!” The boy laughed, conjuring up some water and letting it filter into the small potted plants before looking back at Magnus. “I’m the owner, after all!”

“ _You’re_ the owner?”

Magnus turned to see Taako, his face absolutely skeptical as he strode up with a few items in a basket. He looked inside- a ring, a wand, and an...unlimited pasta pass to Fantasy Olive Garden? Fuck, he _had_ to share that. That was glorious and they were going to use it one day for a great dinner of pasta and breadsticks.

The kid laughed again, more of a strained chuckle this time, running a hand through his hair and walking back behind the counter. “Yep! I’m Angus McDonald the Deals Warlock, owner of McDonald’s Mundane & Magical Mysteries!” He motioned with his arm to encompass the whole store, smile full of bright teeth and a sharp edge. “I, uh, set up shop when the Director got the moon up and running! I supply all the food for the kitchens, too, although that just goes directly there instead of stocking up in here.”

“Riiiight,” Taako eventually drawled, glancing back to the aisles as Merle stumbled out with a grin, an Extreme Teen Bible and the metal bug Magnus had seen earlier in his own basket. “Whatever. Sure, kid.”

“It’s true,” Angus said, smiling wide enough that Magnus was...still a bit intimidated. “So! What are you all buying today?”

“Uh...three Stones of Farspeech and this Phantom Fist.” He settled the basket on the counter and blinked when it vanished, leaving only the stones and the glove on the counter. Angus squinted at their tags before holding out a hand.

“Money for them? It’ll be 600 gold total, sir. I’ll let you have the three Stones for 200 gold total.”

He handed over the gold to a sunny beam and passed two of the stones to Merle and Taako respectively, grinning as he stepped back and Taako approached.

“So, boychik, I’m getting these,” the elf said, yawning and watching carefully as the basket vanished again. He handed over the money before the kid even asked and swiped his items off of the counter immediately after, choosing to look around instead of watching Merle walk up and settle his items on the counter.

“The Extreme Teen Bible and the Scuttle Buddy…” Angus hummed as he looked at the tags and then the pouch of gold that Merle handed over, squinting up at him even before counting any of the gold out. “This isn’t enough gold.”

“How the hell d’ya know that?” Merle looked flabbergasted, as if he had expected to get by with paying for less than was required. Angus raised an eyebrow back at him, huffing and crossing his arms while Taako tuned back in.

“That doesn’t matter, sir,” the kid said calmly, an expression somewhere between pleased and pissed on his face. “If you still want both of those, we’ll have to make a deal.”

“A deal?” Merle seemed...less than happy.

“Yes, sir, a deal!” Angus seemed more on the side of pleased now, clasping his hands together and nodding. “Those are what I do best, after all! I don’t just call myself the Deals Warlock for nothing!”

“Who’d ya make a pact with?”

Angus turned to Taako, smile icy as he tilted his head. His gaze was intense, eyes sharp, and Taako seemed to step back as he talked. “I’m not going to tell that to someone I barely know,” he explained, and Magnus gulped as the full force of Angus’ attention settled on the wizard. “I think you’d know that, since you’re skilled in arcana, correct?”

Silence.

“...Correct,” Taako eventually muttered, ears flattened and eyes narrowed.

Magnus was startled back to normal when Angus clapped his hands, back to his...normal self, he guessed.

“So! What’ll you offer me in exchange for these two items?”

Merle groaned. “Alright, I’ll tell ya what. I’ll give you the six-hundred gold-”

“Mhm.”

“-for the Scuttle Buddy and the Extreme Teen Bible-”

“Yep.”

“-and I will throw in...this armless robot.”

Magnus perked up- they had more to offer! “And my old axe!”

“What am I going to do with an armless robot and an old axe, sirs?”

Merle laughed, grinning at the boy who looked just- just like any other boy, now. Curious. Magnus shuddered. “You’ll find some other fool to buy all this stuff, just like how we’re buying this!”

Angus sighed.

Magnus froze.

“Is there...is there any way you can sweeten this deal for me? These items aren’t worth just an old axe and an armless robot.”

“I have this deck of cheating playing cards,” Magnus said quickly, fishing them out and putting them on the counter along with his old axe. Angus looked visibly more interested then, less bored as he picked up the deck and thumbed through it. He hummed, squinting at it before making a face and setting it down.

“Anything else?”

“Got a jade frog, I guess,” Merle said, setting it on the deck of cards as Angus hunched over to examine it.

“Brilliant quality,” he murmured, eyes nearly sparkling with the interest in the item. Eventually Angus straightened and looked at Merle directly in the eyes, motioning to what they had set down. “I’ll take your six hundred GPs, the shitty axe, the armless robot, and the jade frog in exchange for me letting you take the Extreme Teen Bible and the Scuttle Buddy. Do we have a deal?”

“Deal,” Merle decided after only a moment of hesitation- and then the gold and the items vanished, leaving only what Merle had bought and the cards. Angus motioned for Magnus to take them again and he did, taking a moment to look at just how happy the kid was.

Almost like the kid was a cat that got the canary.

Creepy as _fuck_.

“Let’s get the fuck out of here,” Taako muttered, looking at the kid one last time before booking it. Merle and Magnus were close behind, leaving the cozy shop as Angus shouted from behind them.

“Have a nice day, sirs, and thank you for shopping at McDonald’s Mundane & Magical Mysteries!”

 

* * *

 

There was a talking cat with a too-wide smile on the Rockport Limited, cackling about how he was the world’s greatest detective.

They do not mention in their report to the Director that it was them who killed Garfield, only that he had been killed by falling off of the train with Jenkins.

They breathe a little easier after the ordeal, knowing that those wide eyes are closed.

 

* * *

 

“Oh, hello, sirs!”

Angus is sitting at the counter when they return back to McDonald’s Mundane & Magical Mysteries- or MMMM for short, although everyone just called it McDonald’s- with a book open on the counter, although he shut it and vanished it away before Taako could get a look. Strange fuckin’ kid.

He walked up to the counter and set his bag down as the other two chucklefucks made their way into the aisles, grinning down at the kid as he leaned forward. “Got some stuff for you to buy, chico.”

Taako huffed when the kid only brightened and tilted his head. Wasn’t he intimidating at all? “Oh, sir, I love to get new items! Where did you find them?” His eyes scan each piece that Taako brings out, all freshly stolen from the Rockport Limited and absolutely shining.

“On the Train where we got the Oculus,” he drawled with a grin, setting down the best piece- a nearly full set of silverware- down on the counter and taking his bag down. “Here’s what I’ve got for ya, kiddo.”

He still can’t believe that this kid ran the place, much less...created it. It was a feat of magical skill, something that was most likely only done with the power of whoever the hell his patron was, something with power beyond compare-

“Oh gosh, this silverware set..”

“Mm?” Taako raised an eyebrow as he watched the kid look it all over, worrying at his lip as he looked carefully at each piece. “What is it?”

“This could be worth thousands, sir- tens of thousands! This is extremely rare...wait. One piece is...it seems like a fork is missing from this set. Oh dear.”

Taako laughed, shrugging. “Wasn’t there when I picked it up.”

“Oh gosh, sir, that’s unfortunate. A full set of this extremely rare silverware - true silverware, is what it is, that, um- I could have exchanged that for twenty, maybe thirty thousand gold pieces. Unfortunately, because a piece is missing, I can give you...uh, 280?”

Well, shit. He missed out on a big fuckin’ profit just because a piece was missing. “Fine, fuck, whatever.”

“In store credit. With that tiara, 300. It’s fake gold.”

“Store credit?”

“Mhmm. What, are there not enough good items in the store?”

Taako squinted, groaning before turning and walking away as his companions yelled for him to look at something. “Sure, whatever, I’ll take it in store credit. Fuckin’...whatever. I’ll find something to get.”

_(Behind him, Angus McDonald smiled as the silverware set vanished, joining a single fork in his private collection to form a full set.)_

He strode over to the others, scowling with his hands on his hips. “So, what the fuck did ‘ya want me to look at?”

 

* * *

 

“Thought you’d want to check out this Pocket Spa,” Magnus said with a grin, all puppy-like and excited, and Taako raised an eyebrow before leaning in and looking at the description of the item. Merle had walked off to somewhere else in the store, he didn’t fuckin’ care, but…

“Huh,” he hummed, tilting his head at the product. “I think I’ll get this. Thanks, Maggie.”

“No problem!” Magnus ran off with a grin, most likely to find something that he wanted, and Taao considered the Pocket Spa for a moment more before taking it off the shelf and idly browsing for more items. He wasn’t really feeling anything else, so he figured he’d just grab some food to snack on. Didn’t hurt, anyways.

He could hear Magnus excitedly chattering about something a distance away. A few items he was planning to get. Didn’t matter to him.

Taako passed by Merle, who was inspecting a Ring of Recall, twirling the Umbra Staff lightly as he kept walking. How far did the aisles go? There was an end in sight, but he didn’t exactly seem to be getting any closer…

Hm.

He kept walking, and walking, and walking, passing aisles and aisles of increasingly unfamiliar items-

“Um, sir?”

He looked over to see Ango, a little smile on his face. “Yeah, D’jango?”

“It’s Angus.”

“Sure, Ango.”

“Good enough, um- I’d rather you not go further if you don’t plan to buy anything? I, uh, pretty much have endless aisles and many new things to buy, but it’ll take you far too long to get back if you keep going. Just so you know.”

“How the fuck does that work?”

“I’m not sharing my secrets with you, sir.”

He glared.

The kid smiled back sharply.

“Damn. Fine, whatever. I have my purchase. I’ll go back.”

“Thank you, sir! I’ll be waiting for you!” Angus opened up a door on the nearby wall that Taako swore wasn’t there before, opening it, walking through, and shutting the door before he could see where the fuck he was going. He reached out a hand and-

-the door was gone.

“I hate this,” he spat harshly before spinning around and beginning the trek to the beginning of the store, arms crossed and Umbra Staff moving almost amusedly before stilling in his hand. Stupid warlocks, stupid patrons, stupid shop. He hated it.

He hated that the kid was just so- so relaxed in what seemed to be his own domain, dammit. The place was admirable, the kid was clever and even a bit funny and…

Was he actually starting to like the kid?

Taako snorted and made his way to the front, witnessing what seemed to be the end of a deal for Magnus, leaving Magnus beaming and Angus almost completely neutral (which was...him getting a bad deal? Maybe?) before he saw Taako and beamed.

“Hello, sir! Thank you for coming back to the front of the store!”

“No problemo,” he drawled, rolling his eyes as he set the Pocket Spa down. “Store credit and 600 gold sound good to you?”

“Absolutely wonderful!” Angus seemed quite happy now despite the fact that a third of the sale was just in store credit, which was a bit strange, but Taako didn’t judge.

(Taako definitely judged.)

“Store credit…” Magnus seemed absolutely perplexed, and Taako just snorted softly as Merle placed the Ring of Recall onto the counter.

“...Um. You still need 100 gold to buy this, unless you want to make a deal?”

Merle paled. Taako groaned.

“I’ll give you the 100 that you need, old man,” Taako grumbled as Merle blinked.

“How d’ya have an extra 100 gold?”

“By being smart,” he snapped. “Take it or leave it, Merle.”

“I’ll take it, I’ll take it, geez,” he muttered, taking the gold and placing it on the counter as Angus smiled.

“Thank you, sirs, for shopping here! Is there anything else you need?”

Magnus looked absolutely transfixed by his new fish friend. Merle looked satisfied. Taako shrugged.

“We’re outta here, kiddo. See ya.”

“Goodbye! Have a nice day!”

Taako’s eyes were narrowed as they walked out, Magnus and Merle chattering about what they got.

_What’s that kid’s patron, and what tricks does he have up his sleeve…?_

 

* * *

 

Merle walked into the store first, frowning as they all looked around- they had all been in the store a few times since they had been there last, and Angus had always been behind the counter except for the very first time they had been there as a group. At the moment, he was gone, which was- strange.

He didn’t linger on it as long as the other two did. He could care less about the kid.

Browsing the shelves with a little hum, a few items caught his eye- as he turned into the ‘Drinks and Health’ section, a can of Cheerwine drew him in. It wasn’t really something he would immediately buy, but...hm. He’d come back to it.

He made his way through the other aisles, inching his way along even as Magnus and Taako quickly found what they wanted, taking his time and humming an old song that he had learned...how long ago? Huh. Who knew.

Anyways.

He turned into the ‘Curiosities and Chocolates’ aisle and gave a surprised grunt when he saw Angus putting items onto shelves, watching as the kid blinked and looked at him with a wide smile.

He frowned.

“Hello, sir!” Angus seemed unusually cheerful, springing forward with a wave. “I got some pretty new items in, and, uh, would you like to see any of them? They’re from all around Faerun.”

Merle rolled his eyes and shrugged. It wouldn’t hurt to amuse the kid, anyways. He didn’t particularly care for his attitude or for the store, but he knew powerful magic when he saw it, and he’d rather be cautious. “Sure, kid. I don’t care.”

“So this is the Diadem of Fabulous Truthiness,” the kid chirped, showing it to him before placing it on the shelf. “It can let you cast a free Zone of Truth, and only on a specific target! Useful if you’re questioning someone but you want to be free to lie, yeah?”

“Yeah,” he hummed, leaning in to inspect it before Angus put something else in front of him. “Hey- give a man time to look at something, okay?”

Angus laughed but let him look at the item for another moment before continuing. “And this is the Nitpicker! The person who gave it to me- Tom- said he wanted to get rid of it and burn it, but I found it too fascinating to just let go away!”

“Hm.” He raised an eyebrow. “Why would I want it, then?”

“Well, uh, sir, you see the lockpicking tools that it has in its hands?”

“Of course I do, I’m not dumb-”

“Twice a day, it can be placed in front of a locked object to unlock it, the statue comes to life in order to pick the lock! It, uh, goes back to normal when it’s done.”

“...Then why wouldn’t the guy use it?”

“Um. It’s called the Nitpicker for a reason, sir. While picking the lock, it’ll critique anyone nearby, no matter how small the perceived offense! I find it quite funny- I used it myself to test it out- but others, like Tom, don’t take kindly to that sort of thing.”

Merle took it out of his hands, eyeing it curiously for a few long moments and checking out the tag. 900 gold...huh. He’d get it. Maybe he could bargain with the kid to turn it back in if he never used it, anyways.

He looked up.

The kid was gone.

Merle frowned, shrugged, and went back to browsing. Phone-a-Friend Scrybones...the Cheerwine...yeah. He had a decent selection, and maybe the Nitpicker could rip apart Taako’s dumb fashion whenever he used it.

He hummed as he went back to the front, confident in his choices and-

Huh, seemed like today was a day for the kid to make deals.

Angus was smiling at Taako, leaning over with something approaching a predator’s grin. Merle raised an eyebrow as he got into earshot, hearing Taako’s words-

“Don’t want to give you my fuckin’ Pocket Spa, that shit is the best place to relax...hm. What do I have, what do I need, what do I….ah!”

Merle watched as he pulled out the Gust-Master 5000, nodding approvingly as he gave it to Angus. Much better than giving the Pocket Spa.

“Hm...didn’t like this much?”

“I can cast the same damn spell that it does,” Taako said dryly, ears flicking back and forth. “Will you take it or not, kid?”

“I’ll take it, I’ll take it,” he laughed, giving him what looked to be like a sphere, a badge, and a...rod? A stick? Nothing really interesting, but it wasn’t like Merle was the one buying it. He couldn’t care less.

Magnus stepped up next, grinning almost...nervously?

“I’d, uh, like the Shield of Heroic Memories aaaaand- and the Glutton’s Fork.”

“That’s more than the gold you have.” Angus blinked up at him and raised his eyebrows, tilting his head with that same sharp, sharp grin. “Any...deals you want to make, sir?”

“I would...like to sell my old shield back for a hundred and fifty gold.”

“Hmm...let me see it?”

Angus took it, inspecting it as Merle yawned and leaned against the counter. He just wanted to get his items, dammit, but he could wait.

“Uhhh...This is a Magnus Burnsides, official merch, uh… you could put this up if you open like a, a Rock n’ Roll Hall of Fame, or something like that.” Magnus laughed, running a hand through his hair and grinning nervously. Angus raised an eyebrow. “I mean. It’s a shield, anyways, and-”

“Could you sign it for me?”

“I, uh, sure! Merle, do you have a…?”

Wordlessly, Merle handed him a magical Sharpie.

As soon as Magnus tried to sign it, Angus laughed and pulled it back, shaking his head at the three of them.

“No, no, no! Why would I want something like that? No, I want you to sign it with your blood, sir!”

Silence fell.

Merle watched as Taako made a face and stepped back, making his way out of the store before they had even finished. He seemed...pretty done with what was going on. Merle couldn’t blame him. “That’s fucked up,” he said simply, watching the kid giggle.

“I mean- blood has all sorts of magical properties! Tracking, seeing magical signatures, information...and it’ll be authentic!”

“I...sure,” Magnus eventually said, eyeing the kid suspiciously. “And what’ll it be used for?”

“Whatever I need it for!” More smiling.

Merle and Magnus met eyes. The kid was insane, they both knew it, and they were both getting the fuck out of there as soon as they were done talking with the kid.

“Am I gonna die?”

“Of course not! Now, will you sign this in blood or not?”

Eventually, Magnus caved and signed his name in blood on the back of the shield, whimpering at the slight sting of the small wound he had cut before Merle rolled his eyes and patched him up. For a fighter, Magnus was more of a soft puppy than a rough boy.

“Now!” Angus clapped, sending the shield and money away before smiling down at Merle. “What are you getting?”

Merle had never been so glad that he didn’t go over the amount of gold he had.

They booked it as soon as Angus sent the money away.

“Sirs- where are you- _aaaand_ they’re gone.”

 

* * *

 

It was the middle of the night, and Taako Taaco was on a mission.

He stood outside the entrance to McDonald’s Mundane & Magical Mysteries, eyes narrowed as he stared at its charming, unassuming and tiny exterior. He peeked through the dim windows to find nothing. Nothing at all. Completely dark. No light. The place was closed. Thank the gods that he had darkvision.

He cast Knock and crept inside, eyes adjusting to the slightly dimmer atmosphere. The aisles to the left were empty, although the glass cases to the right were full- Taako blinked at the Flaming Poisoning Raging Sword of Doom before shrugging and moving on. He had more things to do, like to check out the fucking magic of this place.

_True Seeing._

He blinked at the new rush of information, noting just how- well, just how fuckin’ magical everything was. It was lit up like a Candlenights display, and not in a good way. The only mundane things were the materials and the plants, although everything but the plants were enchanted to the teeth.

He shuddered.

Taako eyed the spiral staircase upstairs, noting a trap or two before casting Levitate and floating upwards, landing on the walkway that could oversee the main shop. Doors upon doors lined the walled part of the walkway, unlabeled compared to the lovingly noted items that were usually on the shelves below. There was an open area with bookshelves stretching higher and higher, he saw, though- almost like it stretched up until there were no more books.

 _Fuck,_ the magic was powerful.

He adjusted his hat, ears flattened as he made his way through the shelves, ready for something to jump out at him. Nothing, not even a candle lit the space, and the only way to go upwards seemed to be a spell. Nowhere to walk to get to the highest books. Nowhere to climb.

He eyed the books that were this far down and slid one out, skimming the cover. Blank except for an illustration of a many-eyed creature, one with a gaping maw and sharp teeth and it...was making him shudder. Nothing made him shudder. He put the book back.

“You shouldn’t be up here, sir.”

He whirled around, Umbra Staff extended to find Ango, a hand rubbing at sleepy eyes even though a grave expression was on his face. He looked around, snarling but did nothing- this was very much Ango’s domain, and there was so much raw magical energy up here, not as defined as it was below- he was loath to cross it and make it form into something tangible.

“I- hey, chico.”

“Is Angus too much to say?” The boy frowned at him, hands on his hips as if he was trying to make an intimidating pose. His loose magic rose up behind him.

“Don’t know what’cha mean, Agnes.”

A sigh. “I don’t know why I bother. Why are you up here, Taako? I thought you knew that some things are better left alone. Even the Director doesn’t come up here.” His stern frown made Taako look away. “I...just why?”

“You’re too powerful for any normal goddamn kid and- oh, fuck, you’ve cast Zone of Truth on me, haven’t you?”

“Yep!” Ango’s eyes seemed to sparkle as the lights nearby turned on, casting him in a warm, soft light. It only served to make him all the more intimidating. “Did you come here to see if you could find out any more about my patron? About me?”

Taako growled, bowing his head. “...Yes.”

Silence fell. Taako looked up and noted the mug of hot chocolate that Angus was sipping. It had not been there a second ago. He sighed. “You just- are you being used? By whatever you made a pact with?”

A sip of the drink, which now seemed to be iced coffee. “Hmm. Maybe we should go sit down, sir.”

Taako followed him quietly, eyes still narrowed, ears flattened as much as they could be in paranoia and distrust.

“Let’s go…” Angus stopped, sipping at hot chocolate with many marshmallows in it as he looked at the doors lining the wall. “In...here. More comfortable seats, anyways.”

The door opened up into what seemed to be a study, with bookshelves lined with slim volumes as Angus sunk into a chair behind a desk. Scowling, Taako did the same on the other side, finding an empty mug on the front of his desk, just ever-so-close to him.

“What would you like to drink, sir?”

He squinted, not trusting the gesture. “I’d rather not drink anything you’d want to give me.”

Angus seemed to consider that for a moment before shrugging, the mug vanishing. “Fair.” Fingers drummed on the table, almost anxiously as Ango looked at something past Taako. He could feel- something. A presence that hadn’t been there before. Something powerful, something _wanting_.

He did not look back. He kept staring at Agnes’ face as he smiled, nodded, and-

-the presence was gone. Taako heaved a sigh of relief.

“Sorry about that,” Angus chirped, looking for all the world like an adorable kid that anyone could trust. He knew better than that, though. “I had to...check on some things.” He looked tired, so tired- and Taako watched as Angus sipped at hot coffee before settling the mug down and clasping his hands together.

“My patron is a very smart, very powerful being,” Angus begun, unclasping his hands and drumming his fingers again on the table in something that Taako knew resembled anxiety. “I was...very sick, three or four years ago. Very, very sick. They...took an interest in me. Said I needed to live longer. And so they offered me a deal.”

They took a sip of their orange juice before continuing. “Their...main skills aren’t in healing, I suppose. But with their power...they could do anything, really. Think the magic in one person multiplied by so much- they may be a god, even. Power that eclipses that of fae, of fiend, of others... Not that anyone but me would know, though. They don’t contact just anyone. I’m- well. I’m their first warlock, I suppose.” He laughed brightly.

“And so...in exchange for making deals with and fueling their power for a while as they watched this plane, I could live. For how long? I don’t know.” His smile grew quiet, his eyes not looking at Taako. “I don’t know why I wanted to tell you this. I guess I thought you could be trusted.”

A bleaker laugh. “Maybe I’ll die after the deal is over. I don’t know, but…” His eyes focused back on him as they locked eyes.

“I guess it’s been worth it, huh?”

Taako barked out a laugh.

Angus did not respond.

He blinked at him. “Kid? You doing good?”

“I don’t know,” Ango murmured softly, looking away with a smile. “I. Really don’t know.”

They sat in silence for a good few minutes, neither of them knowing what to say-

“I think it’s time for you two to go, okay?”

Taako sat in silence, eyes staring directly at the kid as he was whisked away to the front of the building with magic. He had to have imagined the ‘two’- the kid must’ve been tired or something.

He turned, sighed, and started to make his way back to their rooms with the Umbra Staff twirling from hand to hand.

Angus McDonald, Deals Warlock, laid his head on his desk and sighed as _something_ settled in the shop, as a presence put a hand on his shoulder, as silence stretched into the night and many voices spoke in his dreams.

Above them, the real moon shone brightly.

 

* * *

 

There seemed to be a strange tension between Angus and Taako after one point that he couldn’t really pin down, although something had definitely happened at one point. Magnus could only watch as Taako seemed to avoid the kid on their next visit, more money in hand as they visited McDonald’s Mundane and Magical Mysteries yet again for valuable items.

He browsed the aisles, picking up a few items that had caught his fancy as he went along. He spotted Taako looking intently at some Mockingbird Gum, looking it over with a hum, and as he turned he got startled by seeing Angus right in front of him.

“Oh, hey, Ango!” Magnus had a wide grin as he ruffled the kid’s hair, ignoring any attempts to get out from under his grip and the hug that he gave him next. “How’re you doing? I haven’t been here in a bit!”

“I’m, um-” the kid laughed, squirming out of his grip- “-was Taako over there?”

He looked behind him. Taako was gone. “Uh, he was here, but...I guess he left? No idea why. He’s been a bit weird lately for some reason.” He looked back down at Angus, who looked unsettled as he stepped back and sighed. “Is everything okay between you two?”

Angus seemed ready to spill something before he shook his head and sighed. “I...It’s nothing. I just wanted to talk with him. Maybe when he has some free time I can go and find him.”

“But wouldn’t that be out of the shop, though? I’ve never seen you out of the shop!” He’d seen the kid eating behind the counter or relaxing on the second floor or stocking the shelves, but he had never gone outside the shop. Was it some weird magic thing?

Angus chuckled. “I...I don’t like leaving the shop. But I can if I want to! I’m a boy that can walk everywhere and anywhere I need to!” His beam was bright, almost reflexive, and Magnus laughed.

“He went that way, I think,” he said, pointing to where he thought that Taako had gone. With a quick thanks, the kid darted off and he was left staring before he shrugged and turned back to what had caught his eye- the Tarantula’s Bracelet. Something to help his climbing ability, it seemed...oh, to make him silent.

It seemed like a pretty good deal, all things considered. Maybe he’d pick up a few more things. Preferably without having to give more blood.

 

* * *

 

Well. He should have expected that the kid would want more of his blood, especially after he was thinking that he wouldn’t have to. Don’t jinx yourself, or whatever the saying was, he guessed.

“You’ve gone over your budget, it seems,” the boy hummed, fiddling with one gold piece as he looked up at him. “I have something very, very important to ask you three!” He laughed and leaned in as the three did the same, Magnus frowning along with the other two.

“What is it, kid?” Taako seemed less amused now.

Angus grinned ear to ear and whispered-

“You like deals?”

Merle laughed and stepped back as Taako barked out something resembling a cackle, both turning to Magnus as he frowned. “What do you want this time? More of my blood?”

“I’m glad you asked! Since it’s exactly that, sir!”

Well, shit.

“I could...give you my old chest armor, instead?”

Angus shrugged. “Eh, not really interested in that. Just need your blood, straight-up. I don’t want anything old right now, anyways! It doesn’t sell that well, and it’s not like it has any special properties to it.”

“I could put my blood on it…”

“Nope.” Angus stood up from where he was sitting, shaking his head and stretching. “I’ll have to…” A door that was behind him opened up into what seemed like a strange stock room, closing behind him and leaving them all in confused silence for a long, long moment.

“What…?”

Taako snorted from behind him, but when he whirled around the elf’s face was blank, although he was obviously amused. His ears gave everything away, after all. “Nothing. Just, uh, maybe the fact that you’re having to give blood to this kid and you’re fine with it.”

“I’m not fine with it-”

“Here we go!” He turned back as Angus stepped out from the back of the area, holding what seemed to be...a black dagger and a small vial. He gulped.

“How much…?”

“Don’t worry, it won’t hurt.” Angus pulled his hand forward and pricked it with the dagger, watching as- well, as more blood came out than it logically should. He didn’t feel dizzy or anything, but- what the heck was up with the dagger? There was easily a good amount in the vial when Angus finally put a Fantasy Band-Aid on the small wound with a warning to not take it off for a few days.

Taako looked a bit disgusted. Merle only looked fascinated.

“Um. Maybe that was too much for just a 25 gold piece rapier…?”

“Nope!” Angus laughed, shaking his head. “It was just enough! Blood is less important for you than you think, Mister Burnsides.” He swirled the blood around in the vial before waving at them. “Anything else to purchase?”

“We’re finished,” Taako said quickly, a strained smile on his face. “Already got everything we need, kiddo. Let’s, uh, let’s go.”

They walked out to the sound of sweet, relaxed whistling and the chime of the door as it closed.

 

* * *

 

Merle could have sworn that he saw the kid at Boyland’s Rites of Remembrance near the Director, crying his eyes out as she patted his back.

Was he even able to leave the shop? Was it an illusion?

Geez, the kid was strange.

 

* * *

 

Angus had been at Boyland’s Rites of Remembrance, right? Then why was he already back at the shop when they went to go for clothes, and not off crying with the whole Bureau?

Well, he seemed to be doing a pretty good job of crying all on his own. There was a box of tissues at the counter and everything. Taako wrinkled his nose and stepped right up to the counter.

“Oh, uh, h-hello, sirs. Sorry if I’m not doing that well, I just- B-Boyland was an inspiration, and he was always so kind to me when he visited and bought something-”

“Yeah, yeah, boychik,” Taako said quickly. He did not want to talk about the weird man at all, no-siree. “Any chance you could help us with clothes? These two have no sense of style.” He ignored the protests from Magnus and Merle, leaning on the counter with a raised eyebrow. It took Angus a few long moments to gather himself before nodding, giving him a weak smile.

“Um, of course, sir! I updated our clothing section recently, so we should have everything we need in stock for you!” Walking out from behind the counter, Angus motioned the three along, still sniffling and wiping at his eyes as they walked. The clothing section of the shop was a bit- well, strange. Not in the regular aisles unless it was magical, not available unless you asked. Taako would bet his life’s savings that the other two had no idea that it was there.

He would have won.

As Angus opened a door into a spacious place full of new clothing and fashionable items, Merle and Magnus just took a moment to look around and gasp. Taako just moved away as they began questioning him on it, frowning as he browsed through the skirts and picked out one of them, something salmony that was suitably flirty. Killer, really. He looked back at the others- Magnus, who seemed happy with cargo shorts, and Merle...seemed to be arguing with Angus on what he wanted.

“Why can’t I get jodhpurs? Can’t I make a deal for that, or something?”

Angus seemed stressed as he shook his head. “I have no idea what those even _are,_ sir! And we don’t have them in stock! You’ll have to check another time, okay? Why don’t you just get cargo shorts like Magnus? I, uh- as apology, I’ll make this free, okay? No need to pay it back. No need to do so at all. Better for all of us.”

Taako raised an eyebrow. Merle seemed to wilt, grumbling and going to get cargo shorts as Angus sighed in relief. He moved towards the kid, eyebrow raising even higher as he settled his free hand on his hip. “Any way to guard these things against dust?”

Angus blinked. “Oh, that’s easy!” Waving his hands, Taako could feel the power as it settled on the skirt in his hands and the two cargo shorts that the others picked out. “Um, if I could ask, where are you three going?”

“Oh- we’re about to go hunt for the next relic,” Taako hummed, watching as the others went to another room to go change. “Some cup about time. Pretty rad. We decided that we wanted some cool new looks before we went down there, y’know?”

“Yeah,” Angus murmured before smiling and nodding. “Be safe down there, okay, sir? Time tends to mess with things a lot. Be careful with it.”

Taako stared for a long moment before sighing. “You’re an enigma, chico,” he muttered, walking away to go change and put his thoughts about Ango somewhere where they wouldn’t distract him. Kid was a terror and a mystery all on his own, and Taako had something else to do.

 

* * *

 

A chime at the door.

Angus McDonald sipped at his hot chocolate, turning a page of the book he was reading before a shadow fell onto the words. He closed it, hummed, let it vanish, and looked up to meet the face of the Madame Director.

“Hello, ma’am,” he said politely, smiling and standing up. “What makes you come here today?”

“I’ve already told you to call me Lucretia,” the woman said in return, chuckling before she grew more serious. “You know why I’m here.””

“I do?” Angus’ eyebrows skyrocketed before he laughed, gave her a pat on the arm, and motioned for her to follow. “Well, of course I know why, ma’am! Lucretia, the most knowledgeable of the Seven Birds, the only one who still remembers…”

She stopped. He glanced back, eyebrow raised. “Chased across planar systems for a century? Does that not ring any bells?”

“How-” Lucretia stepped forward, eyes wide, and he just smiled and made his way up the staircase. “How do you know that? You only drank from the Voidfish once, and I never mentioned anything to you- we never even talk-”

He laughed brightly, so brightly and she could do nothing but follow, eyes narrowed.

“You know I’m here for the Relics I’ve stored in here, correct?”

A hum. “Most definitely, ma’am. It’s not time yet. Come back here in...ah, three and a half months…? That’ll give you enough time to bring them all back together.” He motioned towards her staff, a knowing smile on his face. “Don’t want anyone to feel the thrall until they’re unable to use it, mm?”

“How do you know all of this?”

“I made a deal.”

Silence fell. From the second floor, Angus smiled at Lucretia’s still form below. “I know a lot, ma’am! Especially about your century running, especially about Merle and Davenport and Barry and Lup and-”

“Stop.”

Leaning on the railing, one eyebrow raised, Angus McDonald fell silent.

“Tell me how you know about all of this. Now.”

He put a hand over his mouth as he felt her magic settle over him before bending over in fits of giggles, shaking his head. “That won’t work on me, ma’am.” Power coursed through him, let the spell wash off and he breathed easier, straightened up, extended his arms.

Something heavier appeared, not visible, not audible but both of the people in the room could feel it. Lucretia paled, hands clenched into fists as Angus stood straight, stood tall and stared her down, the presence they both felt so, so familiar and _so_ , so terrifying.

Her whisper, terrified and quiet and oh so loud, made him beam brightly in the quiet shop.

_“Your patron is John.”_

 

* * *

 

“I have one more transaction that I’d like to conduct, Ango McDango.”

From where he was vanishing the other deals and the money he had just obtained, Angus blinked up at Taako as he approached, a wide, almost gleeful grin on his face as he put his hands on his hips.

“I have something that I think is really gonna interest you.” Taako took one of the items that he had just bought from the counter and presented it with a flourish, eyes gleaming like the cat that got the canary.

“This is the Slicer of T’pire-Weir Isles.”

Angus looked at it. And then back at Taako. And then back at the Slicer of T’pire-Weir Isles. And then back at Taako.

“Aw _beans._ I _knew_ this was bad to sell in the store, but I lost it and didn’t know where to find it. Sir, you are the _worst._ ”

“And I notice that you have a really cool sword, it's a _Flaming Poisoning Raging Sword of Doom_ , I believe it's called.”

“Sir, please don’t do this to me. I- my magic’s good, but it’s not that good. This is going to ruin, like, my whole life.”

In the background, Merle and Magnus were on the floor, laughing their hearts out. Angus looked like a puppy that had just been kicked. Taako smiled wider, gave it another flourish, and winked at the poor kid. “Too bad, Agnes. Your fault for sellin’ it.”

“I'm looking at your entire stock and it does seem to me that's your most valuable possession, would you say that's accurate?”

“...Yes, sir. I’m not going to fight against the magic, you know. Just…” Angus sighed. Taako kept going.

“Well, get ready to talk about that in the past tense, my man, because I have got something really special for you. This is, number one, an exotic item. I know people are always looking for those, you can't buy this at any store around the block…”

“You can have the sword in exchange for the slicer,” Angus said with a sigh, head in his hands as he groaned. “It’s a deal. Already totally convinced of its value. Just give me the fucking slicer, sir, and we can stop these shenanigans.”

Silence.

“Ango. Agnes. D’jango, my boy.”

“...What?”

“You’re not allowed to fucking _curse._ ”

Angus threw his hands up silently and the Flaming Poisoning Raging Sword of Doom vanished from its glass casing, appearing in front of him as he fumed and held out his hand. “Give me the slicer. Now. And get out of my shop, sirs, for at _least_ a week while I mourn the loss of any profit I could have made off of that.”

Screaming with laughter, Taako deposited the slicer on the counter and took the sword before twirling out of the shop, the other two giggling like fools as they left behind him.

Angus McDonald held his head in his hands, staring into blank space as a sign appeared on the outside of the door, saying CLOSED for the first time in the shop’s existence during regular hours.

_Well, then. That was a disaster all around._

 

* * *

 

“I- sir! Wait up, sir!”

Taako spun around to see a small figure weave around others on the quad, apologizing and greeting others as he went. He raised an eyebrow as the kid, clad in fancy, comfortable clothing, fell into step with him and started to chatter at him.

“I, uh, wanted to get to talk to you more! Our last real conversation was a bit odd, I know-” A bit odd? More like extremely odd and concerning, but whatever. “-So I was thinking, um, I could accompany you for a bit! Get to know you better, sir! Isn’t that what friends do?”

They were friends?

Taako blinked at the kid.

He blinked curiously back.

He sighed and shrugged, making his way to the elevator that went to their rooms. Angus followed with wide eyes- it seemed like he had never been down there before, which was...curious, but not surprising at all. Seemed like the kid barely left his shop. He had to live there, too.

“Where are we going, sir?”

“My room,” he said dryly, watching Angus tilt his head. “Yknow? Where I sleep or meditate?”

“Oh.”

“And I have plans, so you better not mess anything up, alright, chico? Cha’boy’s got a hot date.” he twirled the Umbra Staff while Angus dutifully waited next to him, heading down the elevator as it hummed tunes softly.

“Why would you go to your room for a date, sir?”

“You can keep a secret, yeah? And stop asking questions, they’re fucking annoying.” The kid seemed to freeze for half a second as he exited the elevator and entered his room a moment later, at his heels just after the bit of hesitation.

“Of course, sir! Cross my heart!”

“He’s not exactly a member of the B-O-B, bubbeleh.”

Angus tilted his head. “I’m not a member either, sir.”

Taako turned, raising an eyebrow and looking at his arms- and...huh. There was no bracer. His confusion must have been clear when Angus laughed, sitting down on a chair in the living room the Reclaimers had.

“I’m an independent retailer, sir. I don’t do anything for anyone here except supply them with what they need to keep going!”

“...Hm.” Taako leaned against the wall as a tear in the fabric of the planes was opened, grinning as Ango stared with wide, wide eyes. He moved forward when Kravitz came out, smile sharp as he watched his date’s scythe vanish as the tear closed.

“Hello, love,” Kravitz murmured, kissing Taako’s extended hand as he smiled at him. His eyes drifted around the room, nearly passing over Angus before he stopped and stared, squinting at the child before looking back to Taako. “Did you get...a kid?”

“I’m Angus McDonald, the moon’s resident Deals Warlock,” Angus chirped, his shocked- too shocked expression changed into a bright smile. “It’s nice to meet you, sir! All I know about you is that you’re Taako’s-”

“Enough from you,” Taako hummed, making Angus raise his eyebrow and Kravitz frown. “Agnes, this is Kravitz. Reaper extraordinaire, my wonderful companion for the night, and we have things to talk about that do not include a warlock listening in on our conversation, alright, boychik?”

Angus seemed to deflate before shrugging and offering a wave to Kravitz. “Um, sir- I, uh- It’s. Nice to meet you.”

Taako wasn’t surprised when the kid vanished out of thin air, but Kravitz-

“What _happened_ to the child? I- That’s magic that he shouldn’t be able to control-” His scythe was in his hands and Taako groaned, patting his hands until the scythe was gone.

“Krav, he’s a warlock to what seems to be like an extremely powerful patron,” he said slowly, ever-so-cautious until the reaper relaxed. “No necromancy here, fella. Not at all.”

“But…” Kravitz’s eyes narrowed and he made some kind of frustrated noise, shaking his head. “He...felt like he was somewhere between alive and dead. Somewhere that nobody should be.”

“Must have been your readings being thrown off,” Taako said with a yawn, tugging at his arm and smiling. “C’mon, we have somewhere to be. Leave the kid for now, he’s a perfectly alive child. We’re going to the Chug ‘N Squeeze tonight, my dude.”

As they left, the reaper looked thoughtfully at the space left behind, gripping a scythe that did not materialize.

 

* * *

 

The moon hung above a wide canvas, desaturated colors slowly bleeding into more vibrant shades as the clock ticked on. Down below, a party of three was making their way through the Felicity Wilds, off to get a Relic; up above, a woman stood in front of a seemingly tiny store.

A sign hung on the door. MCDONALD’S MUNDANE AND MAGICAL MYSTERIES IS CLOSED INDEFINITELY. MANY APOLOGIES. No signature went along with it, but she knew that handwriting, sighing and pushing open the door. Her shoulders were rigid, staff in hand, and as the world moved on, unaware of what was going to happen in a matter of days- no, perhaps hours, less than a day, she moved in as a chime sounded.

She flinched at the sound but kept going, lips pursed shut.

No lights were on. With a soft murmur, a flurry of lights surrounded her, casting a soft glow on the area around her. While the plants that were always there still sat in their usual spots, the often bursting aisles were devoid of items. No signs hung at either end, no board for what was on sale.

Nothing.

Her eyes drifted up to the second floor.

The bookshelves that stretched high, so high, were gone. A cardboard box or two laid there instead, vanishing before her eyes as she started to move once again. Her staff tapped against the floor lightly every other footfall, the only noise in the area besides her footsteps, her breath, and the rustling of her clothes.

It seemed like the shop was devoid of life, devoid of anything resembling a normal lifestyle. As she stepped up onto the second floor, casting her gaze back over the first floor below, she noticed that the plants lovingly placed in every nook and cranny, every corner, cared for years and years were vanishing quickly, one by one. Bare wall was left behind, plain and unassuming. Unnerving.

With a sigh, the woman turned and began walking, opening doors as she came to them. Empty. Empty. A study. A room featuring a complete set of silverware that vanished before her eyes, along with the stand. Her hand gripped her staff tighter now, uneasy. Each step came with more and more dread.

Empty. Empty. Em-

Her eyes fell upon a series of glass cases- six, with one empty, and a boy whose fingers were tracing the edges of each. His back was to her as she approached, and despite a thought that she could knock him unconscious before he could turn around- _just quick enough, it’d be fine, she could do it_ \- she stopped in her tracks when the boy’s hand lifted delicately off of the case it was just on.

“Lucretia.”

She stared him down as he slowly turned, tilting his head, arms lowering to his sides.

“Angus.”

“You know what’s happening, right, ma’am?”

Lucretia stayed silent, chin raising as she locked eyes with him, denying her body the chance to quiver, to shake. She would not do so again. She had a plan, a mission that could not be stopped, not even by this- this child.

“He’s coming.”

Her eyes narrowed.

He smiled back, polite as could be while he stepped back, revealing all six cases. Each with a relic but for one- one that could have been the Animus Bell, had the Reclaimers gathered it before its proper time.

Her eyes scanned them all, almost as if to reassure herself that they were all there. Phoenix Fire Gauntlet, the Oculus, the Gaia Sash, Philosopher’s Stone, Temporal Chalice- and eventually her gaze fixated on the empty case, gripping her staff tighter as she thought of her family. Her family, going to succeed where she had failed, where she had lost twenty years of her life, the feeling of living comfortably in her bones- they _had_ to make it.

They had to.

A throat clearing made her turn back to Angus McDonald, Warlock of the Hunger, and he spread his arms out as if to encompass the room. The glass cases surrounding each object vanished and he smiled, tilting his head at her.

“I could have kept them from you,” he whispered softly, each syllable echoing in the dark, dark room. The smile was gone from his face now, eyes filled with a sadness before he shook his head and looked away from her. “I...can’t help you any more, ma’am. I made a pact, and this barely skirts it, but- you seven, in your century of escape, it was- admirable.”

A presence skirted around at the edges of their minds before a distant screeching filled the room, vanishing as she stepped back, eyes wide.

“He can’t stand looking at the Light,” Angus murmured, oh-so-soft- like a child afraid of scaring the monster under the bed, or in the closet, or the monster that was hurtling towards their plane with a desire to devour, to eat, to sate its hunger.

She stared, eyes so, so wide. Almost unbelieving. “You...you…”

“I made that deal to live, ma’am,” he said, almost choking up, and he was not crying but it was almost like he wanted to, almost like he wanted to so badly but he just couldn’t. “Not because I liked him, ma’am. Or- well- I liked him at first. And then _they_ spoke. And I like the Reclaimers so much, ma’am, and I don’t want them to be hurt and- um...I don’t know what’ll happen, but...I wish you the best of luck, ma’am.”

Lucretia, the Lonely Journal-Keeper, the Madame Director, Leader of the Bureau of Balance and Creator of the Bulwark Staff, stepped forward, extended her arms, and pulled Angus McDonald, Warlock of The Hunger, into a hug.

A few seconds- something skirted around the edges of the mind again and vanished as she let him go, feeling the child’s magical power grow by the second, and she let the Light combine.

As they fused, as the light inside of the tiny-but-endless shop pulsed enticingly, Lucretia and Angus, two sides of a coin, watched on with rigid, silent stances.

“...Ma’am?”

“...Yes, Angus?”

“I may attack you all when he arrives. I’m, um. Apologizing for that in advance.”

She stared at the Bulwark Staff as it took in energy, as its thrall seemed to grow larger even for her, who had resisted it for years and years. Angus, beside her, looked pained by looking at it- she settled a hand on his shoulder and sighed as color slowly seeped out of the world, as everything started to slow.

“It’s fine, Angus. Thank you for what you've done.”

 

* * *

 

Taako barely had time to think as they rushed onto the moon, one Barry Bluejeans in his pocket and Merle and a mannequin at his side. They booked it to Ango’s shop as soon as they could, thanks to a guide from the blue jean-clad man himself, and he’s- well, he’s surprised to find the shop absolutely empty, with one Angus McDonald holding his head in his hands at the counter.

Taako tilted his head as the kid vanished and reappeared, a terribly fake smile on his face as he stood in front of them. He’d have more time to inspect it but- but they had things to do.

“You’ll find all you need in the back,” Angus said before vanishing once more, this time not appearing. A set of keys were on the counter and he snatched them up, opening up the door that had appeared behind the counter to find-

Well.

He hadn’t been expecting the body of Magnus to be floating in a tank, to be honest, a note, clothes, and a few other items alongside it.

They all look at each other.

They know what to do.

 

* * *

 

Memories are filled. An umbrella is pointed at a woman. Despair and horror run rampant as the world falls apart.

An umbrella is broken, almost by accident, and fire curls up, resplendent in its glory and radiant in its triumph.

A boy is absent from the proceedings as he is called forth, finally meeting his patron face to face for the first time.

It is not a face- even if face isn’t quite the right word for millions of eyes and billions of lives and power that was unbeatable, really- that he is joyful to meet.

But still, he pretends, and in a strange way this embrace with this being feels like coming home, coming home to so many people that wish you well, so many people that used their starving power to keep him from death, to keep him alive so that he could be instrumental in causing the Hunger to be able to gather what was its.

The presence is not like the one that settled on him in the quiet days, the one that whispered to him with the tired voice of a man that wanted it to stop. Who whispered to him everything that he knew about the seven figures fleeing him, fleeing them, and set him free with knowledge that colored everyday interactions.

This presence is loud, screaming in its triumph, and he knows exactly how many people it kills, exactly how it draws power as it envelops him, as it welcomes him and holds him close with love in its hearts, joy in its souls at finally meeting its warlock, its one dedicated follower, grasping at him with open arms without killing him- and Angus McDonald finally realizes that his gift was a curse, that he should have died, really, for this was terrible and wondrous and _hungry._

 _Gods,_ he was hungry.

 

* * *

 

Shooting forward on the Starblaster, Taako grimaced and held his weapon close, eyes flickering to Merle and Magnus as they rocketed through the sky, towards the inky mass that was the Hunger. It kept trying to stab them, trying to attack, and it was a long moment until something- well, until something really threatened them.

He hadn’t expected Angus McDonald to suddenly appear on the deck, swinging high-leveled spells as he grinned wide, eyes black and cracks running down his skin and streaks of color running through it all-

Merle paled next to him as they started to attack.

Taako didn’t ask what he realized. He just kept going.

They had a mission, and Angus was taken over by the Hunger or something, and it didn’t matter how much he liked the boy, how often he had visited the shop to buy one or two small things before chatting on slow days dotted with training that made him ache-

They had to beat the Hunger, and this was their best shot, and Angus was causing serious damage to the ship. They couldn’t let that happen.

He grit his teeth, stepped back, and fired an overpowered Fireball at the child that he called a friend.

 

* * *

 

The Starblaster moved on. The Hunger claimed Angus when he was bloodied, when black was oozing out of every scratch, gathered him up and spirited him away and began to attack them anew, a form of darkness and color and crystals surrounding it.

None of them thought of the child in the inky depths, as their injuries were healed, as they were merged with the whole to add to their power while they weren’t awake.

The battle raged on around him; the moon assaulted, Neverwinter fighting back, a lone ship darting up amongst it all, a Song stirring the hearts of all who listened.

He heard a Song.

It resonated within him, in his mind as he floated there, as he laid embraced by billions and billions of lives that would protect him until the end with misguided love. It purged the starvation from his body, purged what had been in him for years-

-and Angus McDonald woke up.

Silently, floating in a void of darkness and color, he called out for anyone who would listen.

 _A friend, a god, a voice, anything, please. Find me. Help me. I do not want to be kept by this thing anymore, I took it because I had to, let me bind myself elsewhere, anyone, I’m so tired, I don’t want to be hungry anymore-_  
  
He was elsewhere.

A figure, tall and dark, feathered and too elegant to look at for long stood in front of him. She radiated power, all-knowing power and he knelt before them, breathless and shaken. He did not move even as the figure stopped in front of him.

LOOK AT ME.

He stole a glance up before staring, frozen there by something other than himself, fear and wonder and awe in his eyes as he gazed at a visage that was not meant to be seen by mortals. Mostly covered by a skull of a raven, but he could see dark, smiling lips, ebony skin, dark hair cascading down.

The Raven Queen.

YES, the Queen intoned, unmoving. YOU ARE A CURIOSITY. DEAD FOR ALL INTENTS AND PURPOSES, KEPT ALIVE ONLY BECAUSE OF THE FORCE THAT THREATENS THIS PLANAR SYSTEM’S EXISTENCE. THREATENS MY EXISTENCE. Her large form seemed to shrink before him until she was kneeling, examining him with eyes hidden by bone.

He was silent. His thoughts ran a mile a minute, however- panic and anxiety melding together, awe and wonder pulsing throughout. A god, a higher being, more inspiring than any reaching out that some eldritch horror threatening them all could be-

I WILL OFFER YOU A DEAL.

He was not- afraid, despite similar circumstances before. He wondered why.

YOU WILL BECOME ONE OF MY REAPERS. IN EXCHANGE, YOU WILL- NOT LIVE, BUT AT LEAST EXIST. FIGHT FOR ME, ANGUS MCDONALD, FORMER WARLOCK OF THE HUNGER. BE WHAT CUTS DOWN MY ENEMIES, WHAT SEEKS OUT THE UNDEAD. FLY UNDER MY PROTECTION, AND SEEK MY STRENGTH. BE ONE OF MY HANDS IN THE LIVING, AN EYE IN THE PRIME MATERIAL PLANE, AND BE MINE.

He was breathless.

She was silent, for a long moment.

DO YOU ACCEPT?

“Of course,” Angus whispered, voice breaking as he broke from her hold, as he bowed his head to her once again, eyes closed and hands clenched. “Of course I accept, ma’am...or would it be ‘my Queen’?”

MY QUEEN.

She stood up, motioning for him to do the same, growing in size and stride as she moved back to what he now noticed was her throne, dark and feathery and beautiful. Ravens perched around it, and one flew to him as she sat, curious and needy. RISE.

Angus blinked, and stood.

ANGUS MCDONALD, FORMER WARLOCK OF THE HUNGER, MY FLEDGELING REAPER. GO, AND CUT DOWN YOUR FORMER PATRON- GO AND FIGHT FOR WHAT YOU KNOW IS RIGHT. USE MY SCYTHE. TAKE MY POWER. _FLY._

A cloak manifested around him, dark and feathery and exquisite, and a scythe materialized in his hands and- he knew what to do.

He ripped a tear in space and set out to do his Queen’s bidding.

He landed on a circle of sapphire, back-to-back with someone else- another reaper, he could feel it. He gasped as one of the Hunger’s- minions? Itself?- as it attacked him, swinging his scythe and jumping into the air as something else slashed at him, not nearly as fast with these- new abilities. He was not as powerful, no, but he was something else, something in a whole other category of power- made for speed, gathering up souls, not strong magic and teleporting.

Angus McDonald, Reaper of the Raven Queen, laughed brightly as he spun around the other reaper, the only two combatants as they fended off the surrounding hordes of the Hunger.

He caught a glimpse of the reaper in a split second, eyes locking as they both stilled- but they kept going, kept swinging even as something pearlescent shone above them, as the waves stopped spawning, as they cut down their foes.

“You’re-”

“I know, sir, a lot of things have happened today and we can talk about it later-”

“I- fuck, alright, fine, child-”

“On your left!”

They kept going as everything died down, chasing those that left until they were panting, collapsing at the edge of the sapphire disc despite a lack of need to breathe and staring up at the sky that filled with light, as white tendrils retreated into the sky and burst, showering harmless little specks of light down upon them.  
  
What could be considered a falling star was streaking down as the world slowly filled with color again, as cities around the world recovered from their losses, from their triumphs. Two reapers, one ancient and one new, looked at eachother with renewed spirits, with a Song humming in their bones and dancing around their ears and in their hearts, and the elder cut a path to the scene of the triumph, to the joyous celebrations of the birds and of those on the moon.

They walked out from the crowd, Kravitz with his scythe in hand and Angus without, and he smiled as the eyes of the former Reclaimers settled on him with disbelief, with something almost- approaching fear.

“I’m sorry about that, sirs,” he said softly as the crowd roared around them, as he looked to each of them. “I was- not in my own mind. The Raven Queen offered me a chance to...redeem myself, I suppose. A way to keep going. A way to not be…”

“John’s warlock?” Merle had a deep frown on his face and Angus winced, looking away.

“I- I didn’t know about the Hunger when I agreed, all it was telling me was that I would live, and, well-”

Merle’s stern look deflated as he sighed deeply, looking up at the sky. “I...understand, kiddo.”

Silence fell until Angus felt strong arms around him, as more joined them and he was the center of a group hug, now, gasping and laughing as the world celebrated the Day of Story and Song. Emotions rose, fell, wrapped up into something so much better than the billions upon billions of starving, hungry minds, weeping in joy instead of laughter.

Angus raised his arms up to the sky, former weight on his shoulders forgotten, thoughts of a shop nearby long gone, and he rejoiced in the thought of a world all his own to protect, to venture out and save, and the prospect of- maybe, maybe, a family to come back to at the end of it all.

He stepped back, tears streaming down his face as the hug ended, as Kravitz stood beside him while the rest of the world went on, two who knew the exact same feeling as they looked at each other and smiled ear to ear.

They had a home to return to, people to protect, others to talk to.

They had a whole existence stretching out before them- to heal, to work, to talk to those they loved.

Angus let the feelings sweep over him as he took a deep breath- and let it out slowly, second by second.

Angus McDonald, former Warlock of the Hunger, current Reaper of the Raven Queen, was home.

**Author's Note:**

> this was a mess and i love it so much and it's my child  
> will i ever stop writing about angus? idk
> 
> comments are my best pal!!! it makes my day when i get comments!! tell me what you thought!! 
> 
> hope yall have a nice day  
> happy birthday to kit and sofia, & happy early birthday to eden!!!


End file.
